BEYONCE WOULD BE PROUD

A WKOF reader sent this to me because I believe she has relations to the individual that decked their baby out in the latest Indian Remy lace front wig.

“It’s never too early for my baby to start looking glamorous like Beyonce!”

That quote is what the mother attached with the photo.

The mother also said she had the wig custom-made with human hair to match her own lacefront. “I wouldn’t be caught dead without my lacefront and my baby won’t either!”

F**kery and buffoonery at its best!

MAN CAUGHT MASTURBATING IN PUBLIC LIBRARY TO A WRESTLING VIDEO

This is why I don't use public computers. I tote my trusty Compaq laptop everywhere when needed.

An Erlanger man faces charges after a Boone County (of course!) Sheriff Deputy caught him masturbating at the main branch of the Boone County Library.

The deputy approached 58 year old Lester Henry at the branch on Burlington Pike in Burlington Tuesday night around 7 p.m. The deputy says Henry was watching a wrestling VIDEO in the computer lab when another library patron spotted him and alerted the deputy.

Henry faces charges of indecent exposure and disorderly conduct. He is held at the Boone County Jail.

IT'S PROMO PEOPLE!

(*You can just tell Slick 'Em got shatty breath and his grill is as rusted as their "career")

Pretty Ricky just released their new album this week (did you know that?) and to promote, appeared at a Wal-Mart store in ATL - in the garden center section to promote the tragic release. Clad in their black bubble vests courtesy of Southpole, the irrelevant group signed autographs for twenty devoted fans and three cashiers in hopes of gaining record sales. The mute/wannabe Pleasure P of the group also managed to score an application of employment at Wal-Mart.

So the young boy that's a devout Team Chunk member is real amped that PR signed his CD

OH MARY...

(the perfect moment to enter the "sad Lil Mama" face gif)

Mary J. Blige, your a great artist. I love your music and your Wilona Woods swag. But this Tweet here is unacceptable! When I saw this tweet, I just wanted to grab my 3rd grade communication skills book and throw it at you through my Compaq laptop. Now I understand you never finished school, but almost 18 years in the game should've gave you some time to get a G.E.D. or at least a See Spot Run book.

You and Fantasia would make great reading buddies (she's the one that proofread this tweet).

ANOTHER SINGER IN THE COLE/LONS/PUGH CLAN

On this edition of PLEASE COME GET YOUR DAMN RELATIVE, one of Frankie's lost-and-found pups Ester DeanElite is on track to be the next sangin' star of the family. Elite already got a lil shine by appearing on Frankie & Neffe this past summer, now Keyshia Cole's other older (I think) sister is trying to get like her multi-platinum lil sis.

All I want to know is why did Neffe let one of her seeds lend Elite her fingerless, multicolor gloves and take pics with her disposable camera.

Check out her fresh-to-deaf vocal ability in the video below:

Hey, at least she's not as bad as Mary J. Blige's older sister/ex-manager LaTonya and her awful attempt at single "It's Coming".

PAUSE ALERT: "HE" GOT A DONK

Now to my WKOF reader from Myspace by the name of Ashley who sent this in, I'm know I'm late accepting your friend request, but this is how you repay me?

Anyways, the (Y)ou(T)uber in the above video gets today's honor of "Pause Alert" as he does his best hood girl donk dance. I blame the girls on YouTube and video hoes for this guy's behavior. I guess its a sigh of relief that it wasn't a lil 4 year-old Black girl doing this to add to the stereotype.

ON THIS EDITION OF DUMBEST CRIMINALS...

Can we officially name Lil Boosie one of the dumbest criminals? To make a long story short:
- Lil Boosie was sentenced to two years in prison back in September
- He violated his terms of probation and now his prison sentence has been doubled to FOUR years in prison.

Thats four years of the public not seeing the extra crust on Boosie's face or his mid-top fade.

BLACKBUSTER MOVIE APPROVED!

LisaRaye, Ray J, Maia Campbell [no comment] and AZ [again, no words] all deliver their best displays of raw emotion for this straight-to-Walmart DVD by the name of 'Envy.' Obviously this was shot before Maia went crazy in Compton. All I can say is this isn't worth to buy. I wouldn't even buy this from Hustle Man or the thrift store. I wouldn't even steal this. I'll wait till BET airs it (sadly, you know they will).

CIARA "WORKS" FOR VERIZON

Ciara has been on a MetroPCS budget ever since the theme park known as Fantasy Ride had its liquidation sale after being open for only three weeks. Now CiCi ups her contract from Cricket Mobile to Verizon Wireless in their new ad for the Chocolate Touch.

KIM PERFORMS "TARDY FOR THE PARTY"

The amazing and talented Kim Zolciak from The Real Housewives of Atlanta performed her "hit" (*insert side eye) single "Tardy for the Party" at a party on Halloween night.
Of course, in true Kim fashion, her vocals were "tardy for the party" (shout out to "Tightrope").

Thats all I have to say about her *drops the mic*